Today would have been my Mom’s 69th birthday. She passed away on June 17, 2004 at the age of 56 of lung cancer. She was a non smoker. She never had an enemy. She had a love for people and an infectious smile, and everyone loved her. To this day, there has never been a week go by since her death from this life that no one has said what an impact she has had on her life. I might not have a lot of this worlds’ goods, but the success I want in this life is to be
Mom on Labor Day weekend after being diagnosed with Cancer. Left is my niece Sarah Dunford, who is a Junior at the University of Illinois. Center is my son Andrew who is a senior at Christopher high school, right is my Kaylee McClain, who is now in grad school in Ohio to become a PAC.
that type of impact person on others she was.
Mom lived eleven months after her diagnosis. She was weak, especially during chemo, but they were ten good months. When she talked to the family after that she said her goal was quality of life not quantity. She clung to the last part of the following verse:
For the which cause I also suffer these things: nevertheless I am not ashamed: for I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day. (2 Timothy 1:12 KJV)
Every fall I participate in no shave November. Last fall I kept my beard into May. In fact, it was the last day of the 2015-16 school year. I substitute teach at Frankfort Intermediate school a lot. Then Principal Natalie Fry made me get a visitor’s pass. I had a lot of compliments. Everyone said it made me look ten years younger.
This fall I could not wait to get it shaved off. I was afraid kids would start sitting on my lap this Christmas season. The beard has become much whiter in a few months’ time. It was not Roberston quality but it was impressive.
When I shaved it off, I could hear mom saying Stephen Duane, I am glad you are shaving that nasty thing off. Even though No Shave November is for prostate cancer awareness, I participate in her honor anyway. It made me smile and brought at tear to my eye at the same time. When I was shaving off the beard was the inspiration to write this piece on her birthday.
I know I entitled this about Christmas, so I am getting to this part.
Mom in the 1980’s. Yes that is yours truly on the couch in the upper right hand corner. The sideways pic is my brother and I fishing in the john boat. Yes I was that skinny at one time in the back. I could not crop this for some reason. Bear with the scans.
Christmas was always special to her. She was an excellent cook. The counter tops in our laundry room and kitchen were full of homemade candy and cookies.
She made three roaster pans full of Chex Mix every Christmas. Mom was very frugal. She could squeeze the buffalo off a nickel. She bought the stuff on sale and always had a coupon with it. I have learned the frugality of grocery shopping from her. You can save a ton of money.
We never had the traditional Christmas dinner. We had barbecue smoked pork. Mom said a big meal hogged up a lot of everyones Christmas time and it was right. There were relatives coming and going. They could just pop a plate in the microwave.
When Dad pastored the Rescue Free Will Baptist church north of Whittington, instead of having a Wednesday night services right before Christmas, mom and dad would have the whole church over at our house for a party. Mom always fixed Chicken Monterrey and BBQ Chicken. There were forty plus people in a 900 square foot, two bedroom, one bath house. There were conversations talking place in every room. It always happened to be the night of the Illinois-Mizzou bragging rights game. That was always fun watching a college basketball game with several people.
The last Christmas she was here, you can see the wheels turning that it was going to be her last. She soaked up every gift my son Andrew opened. Her three grandkids were the apple of her eye. My nieces grew up in Champaign so she was around him more. He was maw maw’s little buddy.
The cancer went to her brain and the last month was painful to watch. It was more painful than her passing. The ultimate healing is when you pass from death unto life. She is in a place now that is far more than imaginable.
I have a guarantee I will see her again. I am just an old rotten sinner saved by the grace of God. Because of a baby born of a virgin in a manger, that went to the cross to die for our sins, we all can have that promise one day by accepting the ultimate gift.
Steve Dunford is a guest columnist for FranklinCounty-news.com
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